2011英语六级高分范文(六)
2016-03-18 17:55:56   来源：作文地带    双击单词自动翻译

　　Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Credit Cards on Campus. You should write at least 150 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:

　　1)近年来越来越多的大学生开始使用信用卡

　　2)分析产生该现象的原因

　　3)针对大学生使用信用卡提出你的建议　 我要高分

　　Credit Cards on Campus

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　　行文思路

　　本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象，提纲第2点要求分析产生该现象的原因，提纲第3点要求针对该现象给出“我”的建议，由此可判断本文应为现象解释型作文。

　　根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：描述大学生使用信用卡的现状;分析大学生信用卡用户增加的原因;针对大学生使用信用卡提出“我”的建议。

　　高分范文

　　Credit Cards on Campus

　　In recent years, credit cards have [1]gained more popularity among college students. [2]With banks’ more focus on college market, [3]an increasing number of college students have applied for a credit card and begun to consume by it.

　　[4]The following three factors can account for the popularity of credit cards in college. [5]Firstly, a credit card provides overdrawing service, [6]which is [7]a big attraction for those students who have no much money for their domination. [5]Secondly, a credit card can help release financial burdens on those poor students, and [8]hence reduce the risk of their dropping school for lacking money. [5]Besides, many banks make some preferential policies on credit cards, like sending a gift, lowering year cost. [7]Drawn by these policies, many college students apply for credit cards.

　　[5]As far as I am concerned, it is not a bad thing for college students to own credit cards. [5]However, there is misuse of credit cards among college students. Many students use credit cards to buy luxurious things they don’t need really, and even some of them owe a big credit cards debt. [5]Therefore, schools and banks have responsibility to let college students learn how to use credit cards properly. [9]Only in this way can college students enjoy really the advantages of credit cards.

　　【亮点点评】

　　[1]“越来越流行”。

　　[2]“随着”，介词。

　　[3]“越来越多的”。

　　[4]用于引出原因。

　　[5]过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。

　　[6]which引导非限制性定语从句。

　　[7]表示“吸引”的两种不同的方式，用词富于变化。

　　[8]“由此，因此”。

　　[9]“only+状语”位于句首，引起句子部分倒装。